New Ideas on Solo Lifestyles

How can I find joy and contentment living alone in mid-life when others around me are immersed in their partnered lives?

Embracing solo living means embarking on a journey of self-discovery, building meaningful community connections, and pursuing passions that bring joy and fulfillment to your daily life. It’s not about conforming to others’ expectations or seeking validation from those who don’t recognize your worth. It’s about cultivating genuine self-love.

It’s about uncovering the activities and experiences that uplift your spirit and bring you happiness. It’s about understanding your true self and finding authentic ways to engage with your community, creating a true sense of belonging and connection.

What can sometimes be difficult about living solo, even though I love it on the whole?

Canadian society continues to cling to the outdated belief that people grow up, find a partner, start a family, and remain together for life. This narrative no longer reflects today’s reality, yet both the media and society at large persist in upholding it, ignoring those who do not fit this mold.

Statistics from Statistics Canada in 2021 show that approximately 3.8 million Canadians aged 40 and over live alone, representing about 20% of that age group. For those over 50, this figure rises to around 29%, and among those over 65, it jumps significantly to between 40% and 50%.

You’d never know it (this will be a longer discussion in one of my blogs).

Sometimes life throws a few curveballs, and it’s easy to feel a bit off. Things like:

• Feeling ignored, dismissed, or left out
• Struggling with money or financial ups and downs on a single income
• Finding it a little tougher to manage challenging moments on your own such as illness, personal dilemmas and home projects
• Not having a built-in support person in your corner to be vulnerable with

These challenges can be addressed with thoughtful strategies, which I aim to share in this blog.

The advice is always to find “my people”. How do I do that?

Join in — check out local clubs, online groups, or activities that match what you love.

Keep it real — meeting new people can feel awkward, and that’s totally normal.

No pressure — don’t push yourself to make instant besties.

Find your people — notice who feels like a good vibe or kindred spirit. Don’t hang with people you wouldn’t choose to just to have something to do.

Start small — a quick chat or shared laugh is plenty in an environment that “feels like you”.

Grow it naturally — as you keep showing up, those connections will build into something bigger.

What are some ways to not just survive but thrive, as a solo in Canada?

• Change any negative thoughts about being solo.
• You are enough just as you are, even if others imply otherwise.
• Build a strong sense of self and follow your own path, not what others expect.
• Get to know yourself by journalling and practicing gratitude and self-love every day.
• Be your own biggest fan. Celebrate what matters to you and invite others to share in it. Focus on healthy habits, mindfulness, and new hobbies to care for your mind and body.
• When others make assumptions or say insensitive things to you, stand confidently in your truth and address it. There are many rude or intrusive comments made to single people by those who are not single, but I don’t think these comments were intended to be hurtful. They just can’t see things from a solo person’s perspective and don’t recognize their bias. Educate them.
• Dream big and move forward to create the life you want.